i can...nvm.

in huge trouble. my parents have my car because they decided to be nice and fill it up with gas and a car wash. it's just an excuse to dig through it. my mom just called and asked me about this condom she found in the glove box (unopened!) and i told her someone must have put it there as a joke.

last thing i want is for my parents to think i'd ever think of being sexually active before marriage. i used to think, what the hell, it's just sex. but then i started going on wed.s to j and h's church and i started to really question what i believed in. it's kind of ironic because j and i were talking about how sex is what really makes a marriage a marriage instead of just a relationship yesterday.

my parents must have been in shock. i learned only recently that my brother and his ex. had slept together and it's because i over-heard them and i read his ex's blog. i was shocked. talk about tmi. he once showed me all these condoms this kid had given him as a joke, but wow. i still don't want to admit my brother had sex. it's so...wrong. he was a freshman! it was his first girlfriend. he was, he is so young. my brother is growing up a lot faster than i want him to. i wish he would get some beliefs other than "live for the moment".

he doesn't believe in God. he always laughs if i mention Him or the impact He makes on our lives everyday. i wish he'd believe in something other than "we just appeared one day". i'd be thrilled if he became christian, but that is a little too far to reach for him. from going from believing their is no God to becoming a christian? not gonna happen. even if he never finds God, i want him to have strong beliefs. hard to expect from a boy who shoplifts, smokes, and has/had sex. maybe i could try and convince him to become a "recycled virgin".

songs about babies and love that goes right.